Today, Tim and I got some disappointing news...
Last Thursday, we were so excited to be interviewed by a local church searching for a full-time youth minister. It's a good sized church with a great reputation, so of course, we were thrilled. We knew at the interview that they were looking at 2 other couples. I felt that the interview went great. Tim just has a way of sharing his heart and his love for the Lord is so obvious. I was VERY nervous, but after a few questions, the 5 person search committee and pastor made me feel very comfortable. After the interview, we felt confident. We also felt like the Lord was tugging at our hearts and was going to open some doors and allow us to serve at this church.
Today, Tim got a call from the pastor explaining that they had decided to go with someone else. Tim asked a few questions, got a few answers, and ended genuinely telling him that he was glad that God led them to the person that they were looking for.
I am so disappointed right now.
Tim was called to the ministry several years ago. Within the past 3 years, I also have a strong desire to minister with him. Why would God call us to serve Him and then allow doors to be slammed in our faces? This is the fourth church that we have had a good chance to serve at full-time, but there has always been a reason like "you haven't been to seminary yet" or "you don't have enough experience", etc. He sometimes never hears anything at all from the churches that he has sent his resume to.
Is it wrong for me to ask God why? Is it wrong to be frustrated right now? I strongly believe that God has a plan for us, but it is SO hard to understand Him when things like this keep on happening. Tim and I are so anxious to be serving full-time. Why is it taking so long?
Since I met Tim, he has been one of the most solid Christians I know. Sure, we've all made mistakes, but as far as his walk with the Lord and servants heart, he's always been at the top of my list of spiritual leaders/mentors. I pray that my girls will be like him when they grow up. I want them to seek the Lord like he does and be as humble as he is. I want them to love people and care about people as much as he does. I could go on and on, but basically, I think that churches should be praying that someone like Tim would cross their path.
Why hasn't he gotten the opportunity to serve yet? There are ministers out there serving full-time right now and some of them don't have any of those qualities. Ministry is just their job or their spotlight. That is so disheartening to me, especially in times like this. Why are people like that in such an important and vital position and people like Tim begging to serve and not being given the opportunity?
I just wish that I could understand why.
I've never been this transparent on my blog and this probably won't happen very often. I just wanted to share my heart and be "real" with y'all. Scripture and words of encouragement would be more than appreciated right now!
Also, I know that there are people out there going through stressful, uncertain, and very difficult times. I would never want to whine or complain because I know how blessed I am. I am just trying to understand why we are in this season and why this season is staying so cold. I'm ready for Spring...
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Why?
Posted by Haley at 2:42 PM
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5 comments:
Hey Haley, it's Danny. First, I am sorry that this specific situation turned out to be a "no". It is clear that you guys want to be used of the Lord. And, in fact, it is also clear that the Lord is still preparing you for His perfect time and place.
So, you want to know "why", do you? Perhaps the question you should ask is not "why" but "what". Instead of asking, "Lord, why did this door close," maybe you should ask, "Lord, what do you us to learn through this?"
Where do you start with life's disappointments? A good place to start is in the essential goodness of God (Romans 8:28). Another place of comfort is in recognizing the absolute sovereignty of God in all things (see any page in Scripture).
God desires to use every experience of our lives to teach us things about His character and will. He isn't afraid of us asking the "why" question, that's for sure. But, always remember that He wants us to grow through the ups-and-downs of life; He sometimes chooses to allow disappointment (and even pain) for our ultimate good and His ultimate glory.
Be encouraged by a beloved verse by so many: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5-6
We love you guys and are praying for you.
Thank you, Danny. That is the way that we are trying to look at, but it's still hard. I loved the quote "He chooses to allow disappointments (and even pain) for our ultimate good and His ultimate glory." I think I might write that on an index card and put it in my mirror :-) Thanks for the encouragement! We love you guys!
I see Danny beat me to a comment (and was signed in under my name). I don't have much to add except that we love you guys and continue to pray for you. Waiting is often a difficult, but necessary, part of God's plan. Much love!
Haha...I just figured that you read my post and said "Hey Honey, you better handle this one!" We love you guys too. I was using my blog to vent :-). I'm feeling much better now. Still disappointed, but not all torn up like I was earlier.
I am so "amening" Danny's comment.
Sweet girl, you just keep talking it out with God. Keep your face on the carpet and listen to Him. I'm praying now that you will feel strong during this time.
Hugs
steph.
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